Jesus Plays My Guitar

A music store in Ludington, Michigan will be holding on to one of its Washburn D46SP acoustic guitars because some people see in it the face of Jesus.

The son of God’s beatific countenance has graced toast, pizzas, knobby trees, and a glob of plaster in one of my previous apartments, but this is the first known account of Jesus’s face appearing on a guitar. And just in time for Christmas! What a blessedly musical new year this miracle must portend.

This reminds me of that time in college when during a party I convinced my guests that the 60s-era rooster portrait created with thousands of multi-colored dried beans VERY prominently adorning one wall of my dining room was actually the technological pre-cursor to those trick digital 3-D posters that were so popular at the time.

My friends saw through the beans to the soul of the rooster portrait, envisioning a pastoral scene of horses running in a field, fish swimming in a bowl, and Margaret Thatcher. It was too fun to ever admit the canvas held no hidden images. But anyway, back to Jesus.

The Luddington Daily News reports Jeff Hoyer, who has worked at the blessed music store for over 20 years, said he has never seen anything like it.

“I don’t know what the odds are of this face showing up, but we’ll probably never see it again,” he said.

Hoyer says many people say there is a face on the guitar.

“They say that it looks like the Shroud (of Turin), some people say there’s a face, but a lot of people have said it looks like Jesus, so I guess you make your own decision what it looks like. …but it does remind me of the Shroud.”

However, Hoyer also recognized similarities to someone closer to home: “It also reminds me of my brother, he’s a biker.”

To me the grain of the guitar more closely resembles the traditional police sketch of human-napping space aliens, but my expertise in these matters is questionable since I can’t even recognize the man-in-the-moon.

Here’s a video if you want to examine the Jesus guitar more closely.